Stop and think back over your day. Take time to reflect on what got your love and devotion. On what got your time and affection….the TV, phone, friends, kids, work, dog, car, maybe it was your to do list or even school. Now transfer and put your husbands name at the top. What would you need to change to have him get your time, love, devotion and affection?
I have found that when I cram my day full…with even good things …my husband always seems to get my left over. And just like left over food, it’s never very tasty. Once in a while we need to extend grace to each other and allow this but having this pattern over and over, it will take a toll. And before you know it the days have turned to months and months to years and you look over and wonder, “what happened to our love and affection for each other?”
Start today to change this, turn off the TV and listen to each other, or snuggle in and watch something together, soft sweet touches can stimulate loving feelings. Tell the friend, kids and dog NO! It won’t be the end of the world if you don’t have lunch with a friend or the kids miss some activity or even the dog gets snuggled later. I’ve learned when I tell someone or something Yes then I’m having to tell my husband NO later and that can result in hurt feelings and these seeds are not the seeds I want sown in my marriage.
Sometimes we prioritize other things in our life first because we feel more love from them. I can receive more high fives and “way to go” at a work project than I can from my husband at times. Even a ladies bible study, could take my love and devotion if I’m not careful. A movie night with the kids, an exercise class all good things in themselves, but if you are doing these to avoid the time and energy you should spend with your husband your motives are wrong and you must change.
If you truly want to have an intimate marriage it takes time, devotion, love and affection. Ask God to open your eyes and to hold your hand as you seek him. Allow him to direct your steps in making the changes you need in loving your man more deeply and passionately.
Leave a Reply